October 3, 2012—a date which will live in infamy— reality TV show host Donald J. Trump was suddenly and deliberately attacked by the cheap 12 inch square marble tiles behind the speaker at the UN. In typical Trump fashion, he offered to replace them with beautiful marble slabs if asked. Whether he was asked or not (probably not) remains unknown. But Americans should take comfort in the fact that Trump was able to put aside his hatred of green marble tiles long enough to tell the UN to basically fuck off because #AmericaFirst.
There's Literally A Trump Tweet For EVERYTHING!